The Return of My Wit!

First, when you read that title, it should be read "The Weturn of My Wit!" because as soon as I wrote it, that's how it sounded in my head. No, I haven't developed a speech impediment, I just think it sounds better. Get over it. And yes, I'm just awfully silly today and everyday this week. Whitney figured it out. When I'm not in school I can use my brains for much more entertaining purposes than calculating voltage drop, static pressure, t-tests, etc. So for your entertainment, here's what has been making me laugh lately.

Me to Kyle: "My roommate from oz just called me which means she's at the pub, she's drunk and soulja boy is playing. I love my friends."

Me to Kyle (Speaking of work): "I waste plenty of time and they're still impressed with my productvity. They set the bar high obviously!"

Me to Jenn and Melissa: "Bahahahaha I just saw a lady at work wearing an oversizes denim shirt and leopard leggings."

Jared to Me: "We are also joining a kickball league that starts the first week in june so we are going to be practicing that a lot too"

Me: "poooooooop"
Rob: "Poopy farts. but on another note do you have my notebook in your car by chance?"

Matt to Me: "I just got a call from my aunt, who handed the phone to their tech guy to ask me questions. I was tech support for the tech support FML"

Jared: then me and polar bear usually go work on our cannonballs
me: haha that's a nice end to the day. i wish i had a pool. JO really should work on that
Jared: its a absolute dream. yeah that would be awesome.. i would come back and work as a life guard and live in a little hut by the pool
me: and rescue me when i have a few too many margaritas and fall in
Jared: that is just the story of your life .. you're a regular tequila queen
me: i'm such a lush

This was a quote I found from a website but it something I would totally say:
(608): Multitasking record: pooping whilst putting on shoes and cleaning ear with q-tip. All while texting. (608): Update: fell off toilet, one shoe on, q-tip still in ear. Not a pro.
AND LASTLY... FOR ADULT EYES ONLY!!

Me to Whitney: "I was writing on your wall and saw your friend with the last name "matsubara" but that's not what registered in my mind!!"